Old Age Rejuvenator Centrifuge


(Here we see amazing effect on aged crone).

Mayhaps Ponce de Leon was keeping too far in south in his search for Fountain of Youth. If he had made talk with Metody he might have headed to Llanelli and there made himself young riding on Metody’s Carousel Of Youth, my new medical theory recently advanced. Since old age is our final yielding to inevitable, resistless pull of gravity is I think so necessary only to overcome gravity and then overcome all that brings you down.

No fears of weightlessness are needed to be expressed in Metody’s recent proposal to Medical Profession of a treatment to remedy such ravages of advancing year, by the whirling system that is my invention.

My thoughts is that we have not taken plenty account in our study of mechanical aspect having influence upon senile (old-age) phenomena, of force of gravity. The weight of the blood thrown by the heart into the first reaches of the vascular tubulature must be considered, along with friction, in the estimation of wear and tear. So, too, there is the pullback or weight of blood, in vessels of extremities, which course away from the centre of the earth that draws all things to him.

Do not the aging carry around an ‘increasing’ weight? Is not the struggle to gravity of their sad bodies plain as nose on face with every step? Think of the internal pullings on a weakening machinery for when we age. Supporting gristle grow weaker; and weight of what gristle support get ‘greater’; the arches of foot do not ‘fall,’ but is pulled to ground; the titty falls flat; jaw sags; mouth droops; a old man bows and bends; he is pulled toward earth; his wery eyelids, like window shades toward evening, are drawn down, and at long last he is exactly pulled into grave.

Old age, then, is gradual surrender to force of gravity. Should we not take this great fact into mathematical account in a study of the mechanics of circulation, of body strains, and of disease?

What shall the prophylaxis and therapy be? I hear you is asking. How can the effects of this force be make smaller? Lying down relieves the daytime direction of fatiguing pull in the case of the well or slightly ill; but something more than this the badly damaged type needs. So Metody suggest periods of centrifugalization. An personage in special need of treatment will be made to rest at night upon my large revolving disc with head toward outer rim; the disc to be so bevelled as to carry the head at a lower level than feet; best speed to be estimated by laboratory experimentation. My disc might be large enough to carry ten fat or twenty normal patients. My mechanism would makes unproblematic the tasks, which during day are repressed by gravity. The decompensated heart, with oedematous and varicose extremities, might respond wery well I am thinking.

The principle of centrifuge machine, is that he forces objects outward with a pressure which will be made thousands of times that of the gravity. However, no such pressure could be endured by human being; but a gentle speed, a little faster mayhaps than that of merry-go-round familiar at amusement park, would quite undo pressure of gravity on body. I might add that, to pass up undue pressure on blood vessels of brain, it might be well to raise this organ slightly above level of body rather than lower it, as suggested by the physician.

3 comments:

lilith said...

I think you will make a fortune

Metody Jankowiak said...

Lilith,

I s always a pleasure my luscious. Do you want Metody make your head spin?

Sen. C.R.O'Blene said...

Morning Metody!

This picture reminds me of a night out at The Ferret's Arms recently!

I am sure this lady was there, and parts of me wish that perhaps she hadn't been...